Perspectives

Michelle Obama and Jill Biden were recently booed at the season-ending NASCAR race in Homestead. I thought it interesting that patrons of that Cracker Nation USA event would single out to boo the wives of liberal politicians they disapprove of. Perhaps the first lady’s attempts at slimming down America and promoting exercise and nutrition just might warrant a crowd boo or two. But then, Cheetos and tater tots are Cracker Nation food groups, don’t-cha see.

But I’ve been thinking of late about the current anybody-but-Mitt Republican presidential flavor of the month, Newt Gingrich, and his current wife, Callista Bisek Gingrich. It’s Mrs. Gingrich, as a potential first lady, who most intrigues me.

Ah, Newt. At age 16 or so he announced he was going to marry his then-high school math teacher. He carried on a hot, torrid teacher-passion-thing for Jackie Battley, actually marrying her June 19, 1962. But things eventually didn’t add up — ha ha, yuck, yuck — and he divorces her in February 1981 (recall infamous hospital scene with cancerous wife).

Seven months later, the Newtster married Marianne Ginther. In 1993, the Newtster began an affair with Callista Bisek, age 27. Bisek was an assistant to the House Committee on Agriculture. Ol’ randy Newtster was 50 years old.

OK, now it gets interesting. During this period, the Newtster became speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives. Also there was the Starr investigation of President Clinton. Recall that it took a special prosecutor six years and $40 million to determine that a president will lie about having illicit oral sex in the White House. Yes, folks, presidents will, from time to time, forget, overlook, ignore, neglect to mention, disregard, muddy, misdirect, obfuscate, disguise, conceal, confuse and lie. They will do it about war, public policy intentions and even illicit oral sex, among other things.

Understand that the Newtster was constantly ripping into President Clinton for his immoral, reprehensible behavior. The House of Representatives began impeachment proceedings against the president on Dec. 19, 1998. The Newtster said of Clinton’s conduct that it depicted, “a level of disrespect and decadence that should appall every American.” Appall every American?! Was Callista appalled? By illicit sex? Really?

That is what intrigues me. Was Callista appalled? Newt Gingrich is running for president of the United States. Should he win, Callista will be first lady. Was Callista appalled that her Newtster was casting stones at Bill Clinton for illicit, adulterous sex when she was then herself concurrently starring in, ironically enough, the equivalent Republican role of Monica Lewinsky?

All the while President Clinton is being excoriated in the press, the Newtster and Callista are chauffeured around Washington in tinted-windowed limousines, drinking champagne, laughing and giggling in the backseat as his zipper and her inhibitions are lowered. Did they ever break out in guffaws over how the Newtster was sticking it, yet again, to the president, how Bill’s behavior “should appall every American?”

Did Callista not see or understand the profound hypocrisy in her position let alone The Newtster’s “appalling” double standard?

Our lovable Newtster divorced wife No. 2 in 1999 and in May 2002, he asked the Catholic Archdiocese of Atlanta to annul his 18-year marriage to Marriane Ginther (Ol’ No. 2).

Yes, it seems Callista is a devout Catholic and desires a moral life (marriage).

You cannot make this stuff up.

Jepson is a 24-year resident of Florida. He’s fiscally conservative, socially liberal, likes art and embraces diversity of opinion. Reach him at [email protected]