Louis Roney: Thoughts that cross in the night

From a reader: “How do you tell a Romney supporter from an Obama supporter? Romney supporters sign their checks on the front; Obama supporters sign theirs on the back.”

“Apparently, I am supposed to be more outraged with what Romney does with his money than I am with what Obama does with mine.” — Comment on Facebook.com

Donald Trump is a very positive, aggressive guy who is a master at making deals. President Obama is so unclever that one doubts he could figure out how to find a rug in a Baghdad market.

You are where you live

Here’s the final word on nutrition and health: (Sent by a reader)

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

2. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

5.The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

Conclusion: Eat and drink what you like — it’s where you live that counts!

An age to respect

An innate veneration for age was part of my upbringing. When one was very young, in a traditional Southern family that had aged members, learning to “respect one’s elders” was traditional. My parents explained to me the need to exercise patience when dealing with my grandmother and our elderly cousins, aunts and uncles. The slightest suggestion of criticism or impatience from us kids brought instant rebukes, reminding us that we were out of order and being rude to our elders. One, of course, knows that someday he himself, with luck, may become an “old person,” but that fact alone does not produce the realization of how old age really feels when you finally get there. At 91 I still have respect for “old people,” although I seldom, if ever, meet anyone who is my “elder.”

Unthinking stupidity

Once again my thoughts linger on the ancient tree burned down by an act of outrageous carelessness. The 3,500-year-old cypress, probably the oldest living thing in North America, had survived 35 centuries of the perils of hurricanes, rain, fire and lightning. In the end “The Big Tree” fell prey to unthinking stupidity delivered by a human hand. The woman who set the tree on fire was busy preparing methamphetamine, according to the daily newspaper. Her first trial appearance was set for Aug. 15, I was told. For me, and perhaps many other nature lovers, her wanton act of destruction was a sizeable crime against nature and humanity.

Fairy pols

Sent by a reader (love those readers!): A little boy sits on his grandmother’s lap as she reads a fairy tale to him. He asks, “Grandma, do all fairy tales start with ‘Once upon a time?’” “No darling, ” said Grandma, “There’s a whole series of fairy tales that start with, ‘If elected I promise….’”

What a job description

Every now and then I am charmed to receive a letter from Betty Wilson, who lives in Virginia. That she enjoys things I have written is a high compliment, for her late husband, Sloan Wilson, was a prodigious writer of bestsellers who was in my class at Harvard. Sloan made his living with the words he wrote, and I, with the notes I sang on stages here and in Europe. Both of us were in the business of bringing pleasure to other people — not a bad way to make a living.