Chris Jepson: The rule of thumb

One of life’s big mysteries is why any man would ever be aggressive with a woman. Concomitant with that question is where or how does such aggression originate? What allows a man to strike a woman? How can 20 to 25 percent of American college women report physical/psychological intimidation and/or rape? How is that possible, and what does that suggest about the male sex?

I’ve wondered for decades how men historically could have considered women as less than themselves. It’s a bizarre concept, if for no other reason, that you’re a man and you would couple (propagate) with “something less” than yourself? My argument unfortunately is somewhat specious as illustrated by the recent incontrovertible evidence of Neanderthal DNA in modern humans.

The recent revelations of abuse in the NFL illustrate how the league minimized the problem through inconsequential punishments. It is characteristic of our culture’s handling of such issues. First, challenge and marginalize the woman and then excuse male behavior as, well, men are aggressive by nature and I’m sure he’s very sorry now. As sadly tragic as NFL players smacking “their” women around, I find the statistics of college campus rape and harassment even more disturbing.

Professional football is violent. To willingly participate in such a sport suggests a mindset that accommodates physical aggression as an appropriate expression of human behavior. Perhaps, but is the marginalization and mistreatment of American women as exemplified by male collegians more representative of masculine behavior? If up to a quarter of our daughters are harassed, manhandled or raped on America’s college campuses—supposedly an environment of enlightenment—what does that say about our culture?

I’ll dispense as nonsensical the alleged “rape fantasies” reputed to appeal to some women as mere romance novel fiction. Being out-of-control is one thing (at times desirable), being raped quite another.

There are any number of theories to explain why men rape. A now somewhat discredited description is the Biological Theory. Rape evolved with our species as a way for males to have a large number of partners without any commitment; the ol’ get your genes in as many offspring as possible explanation.

An explanation I think overthought is the Commodification Theory, which suggests sex is a commodity stolen by the rapist. Another theory has rape as a gender based hate crime. Yes, I see that. The Control Theory argues that rape isn’t about sex but control. Again, yes. Sex to me is about joy and these theories are anything but.

A final explanation for why men rape is the Developmental Theory. It posits, essentially, that how the twig is bent so grows the tree. If a man comes from a punitive, violent background (home life) he learns that violence and intimidation are acceptable expressions of masculinity.

Ah, but here’s a major rub, lads. There are many theories as to why men are aggressive and possessive of women. A legitimate question is how “institutionalized” has been the undeniable historic marginalization of women? In what ways today does society still inform its men that it is acceptable to diminish women?

Common law myth had it that 18th century Englishmen could discipline their wives and children with a whip or branch no bigger than one’s thumb. This “rule of thumb” argued that a husband, “Whip’um but fer gawd’s sake don’t kill’um.”

An old high school football cheer went, “Hit’um again, harder, harder! Hit’um again!” On the field, fool! Your opponent on the field.

Could the NFL’s “female” problem be emblematic of the American culture at large?