Louis Roney: Siblings, Ennui, et al

One may often wonder if relatives are ever thinking of them — even once in a while. Oh, there are those incidents that bring forth some random communication, such as a child’s graduation at school, or an operation that calls for a hospital stay.

In many ways, ones friends are more cordial than ones relatives. People usually try hard to keep on good terms with their mothers and fathers, but maintaining a liking between brothers and sisters is patently a much more difficult task, and can even be a life-long pain in the nether regions.

Young kids vie with each other for the attention of their parents, and wise parents try to hide which child might be their favorite. Children are often difficult to manage, if one can manage to manage them at all.

Jealousy is the big bad wolf in a house with kids. I thank God that my grandmother taught me never to be jealous of any other living soul. She told me to do the very the best I could with my own life, and wish all others good will in their quest for peace on earth. “Another’s failure will not make your success. There’s room at the top for all who will not settle for anything short of excellent,” as she put it.

Up to now, I have found a few other excellent people to join me up here on top of the heap —and I can tell you that the problem here is mostly ennui — boredom, that is. A sense of one’s own excellence may make him feel that he has no competition among the human race, and no competition ain’t all that interesting. I am now mapping my own way to get back from excellent to just plain mediocre so that I will be accepted by some plain old equals to be my friends and/or even enemies.

I spend my spare time flipping a coin to see if I can outwit it. The score is now thousands against thousands —and its just about even.

Popularity is a highly appealing state of being, and seems to require a smidgen of modesty. And modesty itself is usually false for it is present only in people who give a good deal of critical thought to themselves. Self-criticism by its very nature is completely phony because it highlights some things you pretend to be looking for, but really don’t want to find in yourself. I don’t think that any human being is ever really natural – just himself, that is. The minute he gets the idea of what he is really all about and how picayune he is, he gets busy working to prop up his self-worth, and the process gets underway all over again.

Such people are clearly ready to try marriage, for marriage puts you under a roof with another person whom you may enjoy criticizing a great deal. Of course, you must parcel out your criticism in acceptably sized doses or your partner will vacate the premises leaving you all alone in your perfect state of ennui.

If you have any brothers and sisters who live within reach of you, now’s the time to make up some excuse for getting them up close where they are within speaking distance. Finding boring subjects to talk about should hardly be a problem in as much as you and your siblings have fought each other to a stand-still when you were kids, and your parents had to separate you lest you commit mayhem on each other.

Some of you may have found an excellent permanent opponent within your marriage and will not have to look further. Most people know that divorce is no answer, but only a knockdown while the lawyers are counting up their loot. And people who find a divorce a welcome pause, seem to rush back into marriage where their troubled life is much more interesting. And so humanity breeds its way ceaselessly into a fool’s paradise of ennui.