Jim Govatos: 50 shades of love

This Valentine's Day pitted two interpretations about love against each other on big screens around the country. On the one side was the film release of “Fifty Shades of Grey,” the erotic blockbuster that features bondage and other forms of provocative sexual encounters. On the other side is “Old Fashioned,” an award-winning indie film about a more innocent romance.

“Fifty Shades of Grey” is the Goliath on the scene. The books themselves have sold 100 million copies and the film is expected to break opening weekend records. “Old Fashioned” has a more modest pedigree, with limited release (Altamonte Mall locally). It doesn't even seem like a contest.

But that is what Goliath said when he saw David back in Old Testament times. Eventually, Goliath lost his head in the matter. I don't know that “Old Fashioned” will beat “Fifty Shades of Grey” at the box office, but it has the potential to win the war of the heart.

“Fifty Shades of Grey” seeks to stir up the fantasies of the mind; “Old Fashioned” appeals to the longings of the heart. I haven't read the “Fifty Shades of Grey” books nor do I intend to see the movie, but I have seen the trailer. From what I can gather it's about a successful young executive with exotic sexual tastes introducing a young ingénue to the world of erotic experimentation. It's not about love at all, as Christian Grey makes evident in the trailer: "I don't do romance." Contrast that with a line from “Old Fashioned”: "Maybe love doesn't have to be perfect to be worth it."

Supposedly, the eroticism of “Fifty Shades of Grey” fulfills the deep longings of many an unfulfilled woman, as evidenced by the book sales and the buzz, but does it? It would seem that for all the exploration and experimentation, there are still a lot of insecure, unsatisfied people out there. Just check out the cover of Cosmopolitan for some insight on this.

In contrast, “Old Fashioned” promises to explore the nuances of the human heart in a more chaste fashion. Think Jane Austen with subtly Christian flair. “Old Fashioned” is about exploring the unfolding of human hearts until they intertwine with one another. It is about knowing and being known (which by the way is the same word that is used for intercourse in Hebrew). It's about coming to grips with who we really are rather than trying to be something for someone else. It's about getting into someone else's heart rather than their pants.

As a pastor I get to see relationships in all sorts of states. I get to hear all kinds of stories. And I have to believe that the longing of every human heart is to love and be loved-thoroughly, richly, deeply. Truly fulfilling sex is the outcome of this love, not the gateway to it. That is why “Fifty Shades of Grey” may titillate and excite some people but never complete them. Only love can do that. A love that is patient and kind (1 Corinthians 13:4).

Which sort of love will you choose to live? Which sort of love will you choose to watch?