Louis Roney: Who can we count on?

The ever-changing quality of life is both refreshing, and vexing. Every human animal likes to feel sure of himself. At the same time, his inner nature rebels when ennui takes over, and things verge on boredom. The French say, “Change is the way of life.” All the forces of the universe conspire to keep one from standing still. People like the excitement of expecting a rug to be pulled out from under them, and, simultaneously, they like having a calm mind, sure that no rude surprises lie ahead to trip them. People enjoy knowing that they owe no money on their house or car, and that their marriage remains steadfast through the years.

Contradictory equations balance peril against security as two conditions that make life adventurous and, at the same time, challenging.

Risk and certainty exist side-by-side in the heart of human desire.

Our intelligence separates our “gambles” and our “sure things” into two groups.

The “desirable things” that our inner-selves favor include: good health; safe and steady income; a loving marriage partner one can count on; a family however small, of affection, assistance, and good company; roomy and aesthetically pleasing housing; a circle of friends to visit with and to enjoy; varied sources of entertainment both at home and in the community; climatic conditions to suit our wishes and please our favorite tastes — all of these with national and local guarantees of safety and protection from outside harm.

The “riskiest” things we do may be: driving a car, flying in a plane, motorcycling, boating down the rapids in the Grand Canyon, sky diving, bungee jumping, parachuting, high diving, deep sea diving, spelunking, marathon running, plus smoking, and being overweight.

In our conglomerate of opposing wishes, we sandwich in the middle a craving for reliability. We adore things and people we can “count on,” and we are often willing to surrender to boredom in a trade-off to win calm and contentment. We human beings are, of course, pretty screwed up in our minds at any given time, and it’s a pure wonder that we ever generate anything that is pragmatic in the world where we live.

Admittedly, we try out many things that flop. We pick ourselves up off the floor and get back into the fray, ready to overcome ourselves again and anything else that stands in our way. The fact is, we do a helluva lot of fighting to reach a goal of inner peace.

Ralph Waldo Emerson in his essay on Self-Reliance emphasizes the fact that no one else can do the same things for us that we can do for ourselves. Emerson admired such qualities as “get up and go,” and “not letting ones-self off the hook.” He knew that each of us is his own worst enemy, and that if we don’t master our own lives, no one else can possibly do it for us.

William Blake wrote, “No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.”

“The sky is the limit,” is a favorite modern saying — but the wise know that it is not the sky that sets the limit, rather the inexorable downward pull of gravity that rules us. Everything that goes up eventually comes down!

First comes reliability to oneself, then comes reliability to others.

Columbus’ first voyage would have meant nothing if he had not returned to Europe.

Reliability is a must-virtue, and applies to every other quality people cherish. If one cannot be counted on, who wants them around? (Ever get stuck with one of these people on a committee?) Every opera house manager knows this fact, as well as does everyone who runs a restaurant — or any successful business whatsoever.

“Half of life is just showing up,” said philosopher Woody Allen.